My MAD Weekend part 2 - getting Set4Sport with Judy Murray

Judy explaining Set4Sport to the parents

After a fab night on Friday at the MAD Blog Awards, I woke up on Saturday morning early with a dry mouth but thankfully, no hangover. (And no hiccups - I'd had hiccups for about an hour before I went to bed, but thankfully sleep cured them!)

After a shower and a breakfast, I said goodbye to everyone and left the hotel for London Zoo. Not your average venue to turn up at with a trolley case, but I had a purpose. I'd been invited to an event where Judy Murray, mother of Andy, was to demonstrate her ideas for getting kids active and practising the skills they need to be good at sport.

When I was first invited to this event, I knew I couldn't say no. I was in London anyway, so why not? I had time before my train to get there. I am a huge fan of Andy Murray as well. The only problem was that the children weren't able to come with me as they were still 200+ miles away at home.

On arrival at the venue, the Mappin Pavilion in the middle of the zoo, I went straight to find a place to put my case and coat. Who should be a few feet away but Judy herself. Within seconds, we were shaking hands and chatting. We actually got talking about Myleene Klass and how lovely she was. Then I told her that I had lived every moment of the US Open final that Andy had won just a couple of weeks before, and she told me that she got really worried when it went back to 2 sets all as she was worried he was going to lose. I can sympathise with that - you always want your child to do as well as they can in such situations and you want to protect them at the same time. Judy was really lovely and friendly - I felt she was as genuine and lovely as Myleene had been.

After a brief introduction, everyone started to try out the games that had been set out at stations around the room. This is when it became slightly odd for me as I had no children to watch, or play with so I just watched from the sidelines and generally felt a bit of a spare part. I don't have too many photos of the event because I didn't want to take pictures of other people's children but I did get one when the children were busy eating food.

The premise of Set4Sport is that when Judy's boys were young, she developed games to play with them and without realising, helped to develop their coordination skills. This was even before she trained to be a tennis coach - Judy is from a sporty family so it was just natural to her to play games with them.

The games in the programme help to develop what she calls ABCs - agility, balance and coordination, which are critical to all physical activities, as well as passing and catching for ball sports. Developing the skills at an early age gets children set for sport but also helps confidence and self-esteem, as well as learn how to set goals and challenge themselves. Everything is designed so that most of the equipment you need, you probably already own. Everything can be learned without going to gyms, clubs or without a trainer and so are very low cost activities.

Watching the children play the games set out reminded me of when my children used to go to a club called Storybook Sport which is very small and very local to us. Monkey was one of the first children to take part in classes and Missy Woo joined in, even though she was only two when she started. They only stopped going when they got too old. During the sessions, the group leader Scott would tell them a story and the children would be part of the story using standard sports equipment to do various activities involving running, jumping, hopping, throwing and catching. They loved every minute of it, and it definitely helped them as it was noted that they both had good coordination when they started school. I even managed to tell Judy about it during the latter part of the session when she came to ask me if I had any questions about the programme. I think Scott was amazed when I told him on Twitter a few days later that I'd told her about it!

After everyone had had fun trying all the games, they demonstrated how you could set up a tennis court at home using canes for the lines and tying some string or rope between two chairs for a net. All very simple, all very low cost. Even in a tiny room, children can learn how to control a ball with their racket. That is how two   Grand Slam winners (Jamie won the mixed doubles at Wimbledon, remember?) started out, so there has to be something in it.

I had to make a quick exit with my trolley case as lunch came to an end. Sadly, I didn't have time to explore the zoo like everyone else did, I had a train to catch from Euston. As I left and said goodbye to everyone, Judy said I looked like I'd just been sacked by Lord Sugar! I certainly did look slightly out of place walking through the zoo trying to find the exit trailing a case behind me, but I can report I didn't get into the back of a taxi to be filmed. It was definitely an amazing weekend - meeting two celebrities who more than lived up to their billing. The only disappointment was that the children were not there. They would have loved playing the games and the zoo, but it was not to be, plus they were back home having fun without me.

If you want to learn more about the Set4Sport programme, visit their website or you can download a free Set4Sport app from the App Store (for iOS devices) or Google Play store (for Android).

Helicopter mother? I'm more like a space rocket...

I was thinking about this the other day. I have never been described as a helicopter mother and I don't suppose I'm ever likely to be. Don't get me wrong - it's not that I'm a cold and distant mother who doesn't care about her children because that would be so so wrong and I like nothing better than getting hugs from them.

It just means that I see myself as an enabler, rather than their enforcer. If they express an interest in a new activity, I will find it and, if we can afford it, arrange for them to start. In recent weeks, Monkey has started tennis lessons and Missy Woo at ballet, on top of other things they already do. I've found the lessons. I've obtained the basic things they need to do them. I've paid for both. I take them to it. And then, I walk away.

The rest is up to them. I am not an expert in either. Quite the opposite, in fact - I love watching tennis but my own personal hand-eye coordination borders on the rubbish. I don't even tend to hang around - largely because I always have one other child in tow, that I need to amuse or feed. It doesn't help that ballet lessons fall the same day as Monkey goes to football training and the overlap is such that Monkey needs to eat whilst Missy Woo is dancing. All I want is for them to enjoy what they are doing. If they're feeling a bit anti, I normally encourage them and remind them that they will get better with practice which takes time and means more lessons. If I thought they were really not enjoying it, I wouldn't hesitate to stop. But usually the feeling passes when they get there and remember what fun they have.

I know, from the knowing looks shared between certain parents when I turn up to collect one of them from a particular activity, that others do not approve of my leaving my children. But the children don't want me to stay, although Monkey sometimes asks my husband to watch him play football if he takes him. Missy Woo virtually pushes me out the door sometimes. It's not that I am not interested in what they do. It's just that it is their activity, not mine.It will be up to them if they want to take any of those things further. They are both still young, they're learning, and developing their personalities and identities. Doing these things allows them to do that. Do they need me there to do that? I don't think so.

Monkey told me this morning that he wants to be a tennis player when he grows up. I nearly said to him that he'd have the British public on his back if he did that (unless he becomes the next Federer, Nadal or Djokovic of course!). I think it's great that he has that dream, for now. Next week, it could be something else altogether. I'm not about to sell my house or push him to try harder in his lessons, because that would be ridiculous.

I think I'm painting myself as a very neglectful parent. I'm not. They read their school books with us most nights, and do their spellings if they have them. More crucially, they're fed and watered and cared for. I'm just mindful of the need for them to find their own ways. Force a child down one particular route and you risk resentment and them hating it; that's how I see it anyway.

So I do not hover over my children and instead shoot off like a space rocket. I think that means I then go into orbit, circling round invisibly, keeping one eye on them and in a place they can easily find me, should they need me. Does that make me odd? I wonder because I hate the looks I get when I turn up to collect them and some other parents purse their lips, give each other a look and I know I'm being judged.

I hate that. My style might not be right for different children - and I've established before, my two are pretty independent little souls. Surely it's up to me how I choose to raise them? Or am I falling victim to the "mothers can never win" culture that we have adopted? What do you think?