1. If you want to avoid a long wait when shopping for school shoes, the best thing to do is to be the first ones through the door at opening time.
2. It may, however, still take half an hour to get two children measured and fitted.
3. It is possible for feet to measure a totally different width fitting than the one they eventually fit. Which explains 2.
4. Missy Woo has inherited my high instep. See 3.
5. Monkey doesn't care what his school shoes look like, so long as they have an association with a character or dinosaur.
6. Missy Woo cares very much what her shoes look like. Too much.
7. Missy Woo has no colour co-ordination. She is dazzled by it - the more colour, the better.
8. In the future, Missy Woo is going to cost me a lot of money in clothes.
9. Monkey claims not to be bothered, but secretly he likes to dress up smart.
10. Monkey looks swamped in jackets, even if they fit him.
11. On the other hand, waistcoats suit him.
12. Monkey has a longer body but shorter legs.
13. Monkey therefore doesn't fit suit sets. He fits trousers in one size, and shirts, jackets or waistcoats in another.
14. Shopping for a wedding outfit for a 7 year old boy is nigh on impossible because they don't get that they need to try things on to see if they fit.
15. Shopping for a wedding outfit for a 7 year old boy straight after school shoe shopping is a bad, bad idea.
16. The children love The Great British Bake Off so much that they get excited when they see the books in shops. So much so that they were moved to shout, "Mary Berry! The queen of baking!"
17. I have forgotten how much I love reading. Henning Mankell books especially.
18. When I read Wallander books now, the people I picture in my head are the ones who played the characters in the Swedish series.
19. Monkey really is ruled by his stomach and comes home from playing with friends when he is hungry by and large.
20. What excites and intrigues the children most when going away on a trip is not where we are going but the sticker books they get to play with on the way.