Friday, 10 December 2010

Dear So and So makes a return

Dear So and So...
Dear Car,

Seriously, are you joking me? Are you determined to ruin my Christmas EVERY year? Two years ago, the front suspension went and you cost me £200. Last year, my battery died on New Year's Eve and so my first job of 2010 was to go to Halfords and get a new one. In hindsight, I got off lightly with that one.

Now, you decide to let the water pump pack up and break another part. All because of some cold temperatures. I mean, come on - you're a car, you live your life outside. This time, you've played a blinder as it's going to cost over £300 to fix it. In December. That's more than I've spent on Christmas already.  Not impressed. No, not one bit. How are we supposed to eat?

Please be nice to me next year (if indeed, you last that long - bwahahaha)

Yours very pissed off,

Your annoyed owner
Dear other machines in my life,

And you can stop breaking too. I don't have the money to fix you all at once, y'hear? The car has to come first so you'll have to wait your turn. Come back to me in late 2011. I might have enough money by then.

Not impressed either,

Dear pedestrian,

The place to walk down a steep hill, even in icy conditions, is NOT - repeat, not - the middle of a narrow road. OK, so there is no pavement to speak of, but do you have a death wish? What's wrong with the less hazardous and better paved roads in the locality? Did you really need to save yourself a couple of minutes walking down THAT hill?

No love,

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